Pimpin' Jack
~by Tym Zero
Today is Fall 26 4th year. Jack wakes up usually at 6:00, sometimes later if he worked
hard the other day. Today was no different; he got up to the sweet voice of Elli on the right of
him. He had be used to this because he had been married to her since Spring 5th 2nd year.
But today seemed different, he heard a small voice in the kitchen, he ignored it. After
a small chat with his wife Maria came in with a tray full of breakfast, she had bacon, pancakes
and some orange juice. He knew he should have asked what was going on, he just slowly ate it
with an eye on each girl, maybe it was a dream or something he thought.
Later after Maria 'left' he got dressed and took a shower in the bathroom he had gotten
built only a year earlier. He still pondered about Maria, sure he liked her when he first
moved here, but he could see how the Mailman had a spark in his eye when he delivered a piece
of mail directly to her. Besides she was into books and the second Jack got out of high school
he hated books. Sure he was smart but he hated school, it was too long and he grew board. He
was the class clown, but he also got detentions so he hated it. He finally waited to go see
grandpa after the end of his senior year. He hated that day when he heard he died; he liked
farming and still thought of that girl he saw so long ago.
By this time the water was all over the floor. As soon as he stopped the shower and
grabbed a towel Karen walked in. He was surprised and puzzles because that was the third one
in his house today. He again just passed it on with a "Hi, Karen!" and was off to get dressed
for another day of farming.
He opened his dresser and pulled out a plain white shirt and a pair of overalls that he always
wore. He also threw off his hat for a brief second to get another one of the hats he loves so
much. He looked and saw all bluish green ones with an orange brim on. He looked at the left side
and saw a black and red one and reminded himself of that one Haloween after drinking at the bar
with some of his pals. He threw on a normal hat and looked at his picture of his grandpa and
left to go outside.
On the way out the door he grabbed his russack and pulled out his watering can. He was
growing some flowers for his wife Elli in the back where she wouldn't look. Half for her
birthday and the other half were to be given daily for a love-me boost. When he tilted the can
to put some water on them he saw they were already moist. He took a wild guess; another woman
was there. He was right, Popuri yelled out "Hi, Jack!" he nodded his head slowly and went over
to his barn.
He thought about telling his livestock about the many women there because they couldn't
laugh. Well when he got their he saw that they reacted different to the brushing and they
didn'tgive any milk. He was sure he fed them yesterday. He thought "right over there in the
bin." As he pointed to it he saw there was already feed there but it wasn't yesterday's feed it
was new. Just as the thought of this Ann walked in and said "Whew! Well that's the animals and
the chickens". Confused, puzzled he walked away without doing anything.
He ran over to the mailbox and saw there was a flyer for the bakery and also a letter,
but it didn't have a return address. It read:
Dear "Pimpin' Jack":
Thanks a bunch, I really enjoy your girls, they are perfect for my
needs, I just wanted to thank you for your services, enclosed is the money
that we both agreed to,
Thanks a bunch,
you-know-who ~_^
**Enclosed 10,000G for multiple services**
But Jack didn't know 'who' he was puzzled. He also looked at the top and saw "Pimpin'
Jack". He ran out of breath and slowly ran into the house and looked in his room. There was a
furcoat; a green had with a red feather and a pimp cane. Elli and Karen ran in and dressed him
and grabbed his hands and got shoved out the door. The other three grabbed his sides and went
into town. As Jack came out of a dizzy state he notice the girls were in skimpy slutty like
clothes, very revealing. Stunned he kept walking.
Just before he got past the flower shop he noticed Jeff running up to him. He winked,
pointed to Elli, grabbed some cash and him and Elli ran off into the Bakery and Jack heard a
door lock. The other girls pushed him along. Slowly he went along.
Later as he went up to the square the Mayor came up and looked at the gals. He said "Well I'm
related to Maria and I already had Ann, so ill take Karen and Popuri!" The girls gave a
delighted look and ran off with the mayor. Getting paid now, he felt rich. Again he heard the
door lock. All he had now was Maria and Ann.
Just as he thought that Stu and Kent came running in with piggy banks. They said, "We
saved our allowance for a couple weeks we want Ann!" Jack grinned and agreed as he smashed the
banks and got the cash that flew out.
By this time he was getting tired. All that was left was Maria and he wanted a night alone.
He saw the shipper come walking up to him and thought that maybe he wanted Maria. Instead he
got angered and talked about his faulty services. He brought back his hand and-
POW!
Jack was out. As he seemed to recover he was awoken by the voice of Elli. He rushed out
of bed in his blue pajamas with little tomatoes and corn on it and looked in the kitchen, no
Maria. In the bathroom, no Karen. In the barn, no Ann. In the garden, no Popuri. He was
relived.He took a shower and got ready for a day of his farming life. Before he left the house
he went to comb the strand of hair that hung out the back of his hat. Just as it was perfect
he noticed a red fist shape on his head. The hand was the same size of the shippers......
**Hi, my name is Tym, Tym Zero, I work on HMZero http://hmzero.netfirms.com , incase you saw
this on another site. I thought this would be funny so I made it, so i hope you enjoyed!
